Reflecting on the journey.

A few days ago I received this email, it took me a bit by surprise as it was a reminder of a time in my life were I was struggling and was deeply seeking connection. The majority of my friends were in the throes of wedding plans or having babies and I was at a different life stage, I wasn't long home from having spent time working in England and finding it pretty difficult to see what the future might be like. It was a very vulnerable and challenging time.

It was interesting as recently I shared the story of an experience I had on New Years Eve - 31st Dec 2010. I was digging deep and promising myself that 2011 would be different so I signed up for a Full Moon Climb of Slieve Donard to reach the top by Midnight and welcome in the new year with a group of potentially like minded people. What sounded wonderful on screen turned out to be a horrific experience, others may have found it ago but I really struggled, it was foggy, windy, there was still snow underfoot it was like an initiation survival experience.

This week I also attended an invite in memory of Sean Boyle on what would have been his 30th Birthday, Sean struggled for many years and in 2020 died of Suicide ( I choose these words deliberately because suicide was the illness Sean died from and the language we use matters)

The past few weeks have brought me to a place on lots of reflection and gratitude for how far I have come on my journey, I am grateful that the struggles I experienced back then are not something that I have to manage on a daily basis.

I continue to grow and develop both personally and professionally and there are often more layers of healing revealed, in the last few weeks I had a revelation around letting go of shame and guilt that wasn't mine to carry.

There is more I could write about all of this and I have shared more of my journey in some previous blogs that I will link to this one. I felt a nudge to share this this evening as it might just be what someone needs to read to be reminded of.

One of the things that made a huge difference to me as I navigated my way out of those times was listening to this song and I still listen everyday.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZTRWQV36BQ

I feel deeply blessed to be in a place in my life where I feel connected and supported by so many people, many of whom where there in the past, I just wasn't in the place to feel and receive their love and support and I am deeply grateful for the people and tools that have helped me.

As the saying goes, " There but for the grace of God, go I.

Sending love and blessings and if this resonates and you or someone you know would like a chat please reach out. Change truly can and does happen.